After reading The Practice of the Presence of God yesterday, today I made it a priority to try to remain in His presence, all day long, through prayer. I am virtually all alone on this retreat, except for the little pup I am watching called Lowell. For the most part, it's a silent retreat. Okay... I can hear some of you, who know me well, laughing. "Gail... silent?" I do have my moments, you know. And it's a lot easier with no one around. LOL.
Knowing that this endeavor would be challenging, I have done better than expected. Several times my mind started to wander, but I followed Brother Lawrence's recommendations and pulled myself back on track. I have prayed for many and when I could think of nothing more, I allowed the Holy Spirit to pray for me according to Romans 8:26. I have praised Him, sung to Him and simply talked with Him on many matters. I have also pondered scripture and thoughts as I have begun to read a new book,
The Prayer Life,
by Andrew Murray
I felt led to bring this book with me on this retreat. It's an old favorite on my bookshelf that I've had for thirty years. When I started reading it last night, the Lord told me we'd discuss it after I'm done. He says I'm going to enjoy it!
Right there...
I know He's up to something!
He reminded me of when I first got saved. From Day One I began praying. I don't remember ever having a disciplined prayer life prior to that. (Although I'm sure my mother taught me to recite prayers at bedtime when I was a child.) But upon salvation, it just seemed right that I would talk with God, especially since I'd just given my life to Him. Prayer was always my #1 ministry. So here we go... another full circle it seems. I love it!
I woke up this morning around 4 a.m. to a knocking on the door. It woke me right out of a dead sleep. I sat straight up in bed and said, "Lord, Is that you? Here I am."
It took me a moment to fully wake, and then, of course, I started to wonder if I had in fact heard an actual knock. It seemed so real. I turned on the light, got out of bed and listened to see if another knock followed. It did not.
That kind of thing can freak a gal out, waking up to a knock on the door at 4 a.m. in a huge house, on her own. But, immediately, The Holy Spirit calmed me down. He is The Comforter, you know. He told me not to worry, and that it was nothing. I was confident there was nothing to be alarmed about, and went right back to sleep.
I read somewhere that when you hear a knock like that in your dreams, it's because you are expecting someone or something to come into your life. I can think of several things I'm expecting... but first and foremost, I'm expecting God! Yes... I have widely opened the door of my heart, and I'm expecting Him to arrive in greater measure.
Like a visitor coming for a weekend visit, I am believing Him to fellowship with me on this retreat. I do believe that has already begun. Perhaps that was Him knocking, announcing His arrival? He did speak to me right then and there. And He has continued throughout the day.
"Here I am! I stand at the door and knock.
If anyone hears my voice and opens the door,
I will come in and eat with that person,
and they with me."
Revelation 3:20
As I went for my prayer walk this afternoon, He told me He would speak to me tonight... to stay quiet and wait for Him. So I'm off to do that right now.
Shhhhhh!
Quietly waiting,
Gail
