Today I stepped out sporting my RED patent leather pumps... to walk the dog! LOL. I know it sounds crazy, but I just couldn't put on those red flip flops this morning! I have a blister from them, between my toes, from yesterday. OUCH! What a sight that must have been to on-lookers. I kept whispering to my 70 lb., english bull dog, Paully, "Now don't go too fast. Gail has high heels on and can't go running with you today!" Do you think he listened? Fortunately, he was a good dog. But the long walk in high heels wasn't the best idea. I began thinking that if he decided to dart off quickly in one direction or another, how I could so easily twist an ankle or even worse, break a leg. Then what? A big RED cast? LOL.
Yes... I need to adjust my footwear to fit the occasion.
With that in mind, my daughter, Grace, insisted on providing the perfect RED ballet flats from Target. I rushed over to Target and to my surprise, the last RED pair available on the shelf were just my size! What a relief!
I began thinking about the word "A D J U S T M E N T S". You know -- making little changes to better fit the situation. I couldn't seem to get that word out of my mind, so I whispered up a prayer to God that he would help me see today's Red Shoe Lesson.
Well it wasn't quite what I expected. Later on in the day, I began to think about how many times in life I had "ADJUSTED" my actions, my conversation, my appearance, etc. around the people that I was with, in fear that I might come across as some type of "religious weirdo." Often I've "toned it down a bit" because I thought this person, or that, just wouldn't understand. I hate to admit it, but sometimes I just didn't say anything because I didn't think people would receive it.
You know what God told me? He said,
"You don't know the hearts and minds of people... so how can you possibly ADJUST accordingly?"
He's right. I often don't know who people really are, let alone what they may be struggling with, what's truly in their heart or what they are thinking. I know as well as anyone that one's countenance is not always representative of what's going on inside them. But...
God does know the hearts and minds of men.
And who am I to "adjust" God? What did I say yesterday? He's the Leader and I'm the Follower. So I'm done with that. He can adjust Himself if He deems it necessary. My job is to let God move through me authentically... not to erroneously filter out what I think people can't handle.
I'm not saying that we should uncaringly dump the fullness of our faith on people. But as a Christian, I want people to see God in me. Remember that old saying... "If you were on trial for being a Christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you?" Yes, God will give us wisdom in all situations. But I must admit that I've (with good intentions) often used my own wisdom and clothed myself in Christ in a way that I thought was palatable to others. It's not that I didn't want people to know that I was a Christian. I love the Lord! And people know that. But there have been times that I guess I felt that people wouldn't get it.... that they wouldn't get me... that it would all be a bit overwhelming to them.
The more I thought about that today, however, the sicker I began to feel. It was that dreadful feeling that perhaps in such times I had been grieving the Holy Spirit. How many people could I have helped, encouraged, prayed for, but they didn't even recognize that I had that to offer? I found myself repenting to God and promising to allow Him to take control of this part of my life. I'm taking my hands off it!
So I stopped by a little restaurant to drop off my book to someone I've recently befriended. I had hoped to give it to her for Christmas, but wasn't able to connect with her in time. I had a quick bite... chatted with her some more... and discovered she was about to take a trip up north. Because it's such a quick read, I thought that my book (The Yellow Brick Road: A Woman's Journey to the Edge and Back) would be perfect reading material for her trip. Then... in my mind, I heard the voices. "You don't even know if she's a Christian." "It's too religious for her." "What will she think?" "She's not going to read that book!"
Was I being tested already to see if I would hold true to my proclamation?
Of course I was. I quickly shut down those voices in my mind, and asked the Holy Spirit for help.
He reminded me that... it isn't so much what is written in the book, but more about His ability to move through my story and specifically touch the lives of those reading it in very personal ways.
That's something only He can do.
It's not so much what we have to offer of ourselves, but what happens when God puts his special touch on our offerings.
I believe they call that "The Anointing".
Talk again soon!
Gail
